Cover Photo - Michael Jordan. Source: Nathaniel S. Butler/NBAE, via Getty Images

According to Michael Jordan’s Personal Trainer

Unstoppable.

That’s a word I used to use to describe myself.

I was living the perfect life, roaming around the world while juggling at least two startups at a time. I’d start dozens of projects per year, learn three new skills every month, get paid a full-time salary for writing only one hour per day, and more.

I had built up so much momentum that I thought nothing could stop me.

I was wrong.

For the past two months, I haven’t been able to work more than five hours a week. I used to “work” 70 hours per week.

What happened?

A baby happened!

Ten percent of babies are considered “high needs”. Well, I won the lottery! My son has every sign of a high needs baby, according to Dr. Sears. I let that completely engulf my life. At that point, the only things I was unstoppable at doing was trying to calm my screaming baby and at playing video games.

I had given up on my dreams. In the back of my mind, I thought it was just a bad dream — that things would go back to “normal”.

Of course, a baby is a point of no return. There was no going back to “normal”. Until I accepted that “normal” would mean something else, there was no way I could thrive again and get back to being unstoppable.

On the grand scheme of things, it didn’t take me that long — about seven weeks. But during those seven weeks, I came close to depression; something I swore 16 years ago that I’d never fall in again in my life.

Now, I’m back to thinking about building momentum again. The first step for me was to read books that really put me in the mood. I re-read Anthony Moore’s What Extraordinary People Know for the third time.

I’m also re-reading Relentless, by Tim S. Grover, Michael Jordan’s personal trainer. This book is the one that puts me in the zone the most. In it, he writes about traits of “cleaners”, that is, people who are unstoppable, like Michael Jordan.

Having felt like a cleaner myself — and working towards it again, I thought I’d share my insights on top of the 13 traits he defines in the book.

1. They keep pushing themselves harder when everyone else has had enough

When I started writing on Medium.com, I only meant to write one article per day for a month. It was only to become better at writing in English, my second language. Strangely, I had built up some momentum and decided not to stop. I wrote for one hour a day for over two years and that had led me to become one of the top writers on the platform.

Many of my fellow writers who showed potential fell off the radar because they stopped pushing themselves, had enough, and quit. Most of them were better than I was, but they gave up too soon and didn’t get to my level. Tim Denning is the perfect example of someone who pushed through even though he didn’t feel he was particularly good. Today, he remains a top writer on Medium.

Another massive project I undertook seven years ago was to build a full-length video game mostly by myself. I wrote the first line of code almost seven years ago today and I’m finally about to release it to the world in September. I thought about giving up many times in the process, but I pushed through and now I’m about to reap the rewards.

Lesson: When you have built up some momentum and think about giving up, push harder than everyone else.

Suggested additional reading: The Dip, by Seth Godin

2. They get into the zone, shutting everything else out

I could not agree more with this. The only reason I was able to become a top writer by writing only one hour per day was that I was able to consistently get into flow every time and doing nothing else but writing.

As for shutting everything else out, Tim mostly means this on the grand scheme of things. If you want to be a top basketball player, what truly matters? Getting your body in shape, eating healthy, mastering different techniques, knowing your opponents, knowing your teammates, etc. What is it for you?

If you’re invited to do something that works outside of that “zone” and you want to be unstoppable, you have to say no. No wonder Tim Ferriss says that it’s lonely at the top.

Lesson: Be selective about your time. Focus exclusively on things that build up your momentum.

Suggested additional reading: 31 Important Things You Should Say ‘No’ to for a Happier Life

3. They know exactly who they are

My journey to self-awareness started in January 2018 when I started journaling for the first time. Journaling, I thought, would be a dumb exercise. I thought I’d write a few lines and be done with it forever.

I was wrong.

I journaled for two hours straight, took a 15-minute break to go to the beach, and journaled for two more hours. The whole exercise was to figure out the answer to a single question: why do I do what I do?

This seems like an easy question to answer, but it really isn’t. I’ve refined my answer regularly since then. I also reflect weekly and monthly now.

What has this changed for me? Well, I mentioned how you have to choose how you spend your time above. If you know who you are and what matters to you, it’s much easier to make the right decisions.

Lesson: Answer this question for yourself: why do I do what I do?

Recommended additional reading: How to Be Self-Aware — The Complete Guide

4. They have a dark side and embrace it

We all have a vice. When we’re still very young, adults and schools try to suppress it, saying that it’s not the way adults should be. Screw that. Dare to be different. Your difference is what makes you unique. It’s your own story and no one can take that away. The moment you accept it, you can thrive with it.

When I was in high school, my greatest wish was to be “just an average guy”. For the most part, I succeeded. The thing is, I had been working since the age of eight, so I matured faster than everyone else. I found kids in high school to be too “young”. But I didn’t embrace my dark side. Deep down, I wanted to be different. I wanted to achieve things no one else at the school ever would.

As an adult, I’ve never done what others do. It took me close to 8 years to marry my wife. I was barely 25 years old at the time. I moved every year for five years after moving out of my mom’s when I was 18 years old. I bought my first property when I was 23 years old. I left my stable job and gave all my belongings away to travel around the world. Twice. I became a nomad and reinvented myself as a writer and photographer (I’m a dropout software engineer). After seven years of working on the same video game, I’m finally releasing it in September. And now, I’ve just had a baby when I’ve been with my wife for 16 years.

Nothing about the above screams normal, but I embrace it, and it drives me like nothing else!

Lesson: Society’s “perfect” sucks. Embrace your weird.

Recommended additional reading: Standing Tall: My Journey, by Spencer West

5. They thrive under pressure

Everything was on “fire”. I was working on a massively multiplayer online game and was the principal backend engineer. At 3 AM one morning, nothing worked anyone. Players were screaming and asking for refunds all over.

Something had to be done — quick.

While the other engineers were pulling their hair out, panicking, and trying to plan an out, I became extremely calm and focused and put the fire down. I had never been so effective.

But it wasn’t a one-off thing. It turns out, I thrive under intense pressure. That’s why, as an entrepreneur and master of my own schedule (mostly), I set near-impossible deadlines for things I really want to get done.

After reading Relentless, I realized it’s a pattern for people who are unstoppable.

Lesson: Make pressure a habit. See it as a way to get important things done.

Recommended additional reading: 13 Secrets to Performing Well Under Pressure

6. They’re the ones getting called “in case of emergency”

After the incident I mentioned above, guess who they started calling when things went haywire? Unstoppable people are people who look at a tough situation and say: “I own this!”. Not only do they say it, but they believe it and take immediate action.

Most people are too afraid to “own it”. Most of the time, the stakes aren’t as high as you make them to be. Always answer this: “what’s the worst that can happen?” More times than not, the repercussions of “failure” isn’t that high.

Lesson: To be unstoppable, start owning more situations. You’ll be the one they call based on your track record.

7. They don’t compare with anyone — they find their opponent’s weakness and attack

I’ve never been much of a competitive guy. At least, not with others. Most people like to compete below their level because it makes it easy to win. I like to compete with my future self. I try to figure out how I can be ahead of my own self in many of the things I do. As a side effect, that often leads to me getting better than others.

But in situations where you have tough opponents, see them as other human beings. They have weaknesses like you, so exploit them.

I’ve made a recent claim that I want to be one of the very top writers on Medium. For that, I have to know who I’m competing against. I’m currently in the process of finding every top writer’s strengths and weaknesses so I can get ahead.

Lesson: When you compete, don’t leave anything to chance. Compete with yourself first, then with people ahead of you.

8. They make decisions, not suggestions — they know the answer before others

When I became the principal game producer on the massively multiplayer online game I mentioned above, I had to call the shots. With something that’s always online and millions of people rely on every day, I had to be sharp and make quick decisions every moment of the day.

Stressful as hell? Heck yeah! But deeply fulfilling.

I had no time for suggestions. Action had to be taken on the spot. I made many mistakes, but it doesn’t matter, I owned it and moved things forward at all times.

Unstoppable people make decisions faster than others. They’re not always right but they get better with practice.

Lesson: Practice making decisions by giving yourself impossible deadlines to make a decision on important things.

Recommended additional reading: Use The 1–50 Rule and Get Results You Want Within the Next 24 Hours

9. They don’t necessarily love the work but they’re in love with the results

Well, I’d be surprised if Michael Jordan didn’t like playing basketball, but one thing’s for sure, he craved victory over his passion for the game.

I don’t love writing as much as I love to help people who read my articles. I don’t love programming as much as getting people good products. I don’t love taking photos as much as I love a smile on a client’s face.

That’s not the say that I don’t enjoy the process. It’s a very important part, and without at least finding some enjoyment in what you do, you’ll never achieve the results you dream about.

Lesson: The key is to find something you really enjoy doing for what it is, but where you crave the end result even more.

10. They’d rather be feared than liked

My wife’s a people pleaser. She does everything so that she gets recognition from whoever is concerned. As an adult, I never gave F* about what people thought of me. It’s my life and I’m going to do what I think is best for me.

I remember a little over a year ago when Michael Thompson told me that I scared him with all the things I was working on at the time. I had 16 active projects and had incredibly high energy. I was on top of my game. I loved to hear that he was “afraid” of me. It added pressure for me to continue to build this momentum.

Unstoppable people are feared for what they can accomplish, not because they’re dicks. I love this feeling. I’m not competitive, but I love to hear about people competing with me without me even knowing it.

Lesson: Accomplish so much so that others will see you as a worthy competitor.

11. They trust a select few people only

I don’t have many true friends, meaning, I don’t have many friends I can rely on to help me no matter what. A lot of people have friends who, on the outside, seem like they help, but on the inside, they’re dragging them down. My favourite quote is this one:

“You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with.” — Jim Rohn

Unstoppable people surround themselves with other unstoppable people. And there’s not that many of those. Friends who only tell you what you want to hear are not true friends. Friends who challenge you to be the best version of yourself are your best friends, even if they might not seem to be at first.

Lesson: Evaluate who you spend the most time with. If you’re not spending time with people who uplift you, rethink who you hang out with.

Recommended additional reading: How to Up Your Entourage Regardless of Your Current Situation

12. They don’t recognize failure; they know there’s more than one way to get what they want

“I never fail. I’ve only found 10,000 ways that don’t work.” — Thomas A. Edison

I love this mentality!

When I set out to learn three new skills every month, I didn’t realize that I was setting myself up for failure every month. What a wonderful habit this has been! Failure doesn’t exist for me anymore. Everything is about experimentation. When I don’t succeed in learning a skill to the level I wanted to, it’s not all wasted; I have learned lessons about what I can do to improve.

Also, it’s true that there are many ways to reach an outcome. Just Google “how to learn <insert skill name here>” and you’ll get thousands of results showing you different ways. And if a way doesn’t work for you, others might.

Lesson: Outside physics and math, not much is set in stone. Experiment with almost everything you do.

13. They don’t celebrate achievements because there’s always more to have

I don’t follow that one as much. I actually keep what I call a “win journal”. While it’s not a massive celebration, I like to record the things that go well, like nice comments from people, hard things I’ve accomplished, things I’m grateful for, etc.

But I think Tim’s point is that true champions don’t go out and celebrate victories because they expect it. They work hard (and smart) for it, so they don’t over-emphasize it. Moreover, they know there are more victories to be had, and true champions never stop training, especially not when they win, that’s when the stakes are at the highest.

Lesson: Expect victory. And when it happens, train harder.

Everything you need to know

According to Tim S. Grover, Michael Jordan’s personal trainer, here are the 13 traits of unstoppable people:

They keep pushing themselves harder when everyone else has had enough.
They get into the zone, shutting everything else out.
They know exactly who they are.
They have a dark side and embrace it.
They thrive under pressure.
They’re the ones getting called “in case of emergency”.
They don’t compare with anyone — they find their opponent’s weakness and attack.
They make decisions, not suggestions — they know the answer before others.
They don’t necessarily love the work but they’re in love with the results.
They’d rather be feared than liked.
They trust a select few people only.
They don’t recognize failure; they know there’s more than one way to get what they want.
They don’t celebrate achievements because there’s always more to have.

To become unstoppable, you have to make many compromises. Tim Ferriss said it best: “It’s lonely at the top.”

Are you willing to do what it takes?